The last few weeks have been a trying time for everyone as we deal with the coronavirus epidemic. But for most people (myself included), some of the most stressful moments come from discussing COVID-19 with our parents, grandparents and other older relatives. Of course, there are some who have taken this seriously from the beginning and followed all the instructions, but many others turn to blame for it with a true compilation.
Why some older people don't take COVID-19 seriously
Whether they have misinformation about how important this outbreak is (perhaps they get their news from sources such as Fox News either Rush Limbaugh), in protest because they can't deal with the stress of the epidemic or know exactly how important everything is but pretend everything is ok to protect their children, there are plenty of situations that lead to frustrating conversations, psychologists Zlatin Ivanov, M.D., tells Lifehacker. Some believe that this is just “another virus” compared to the flu, and since they have survived previous viruses, they feel like they are safe in this country.
Also, coronavirus outbreaks may not sound like a threat to other people because the community is not yet very active, physician Virginia Thornley, M.D.
People just don't understand that yesterday things were going well, then 24 hours later all major games were canceled and within five days the whole community was suddenly shut down.
“We see school closures, community events (and) events larger than 250 (people), but this does not stop the spread from spreading if there are infected people,” he explains. “Until the closure is over, most people will probably do their normal business. Some will reduce their hours out, others continue to do what they usually do. ”
And without age, the human brain has difficulty understanding the growing brain, Shuhan He, MD, a physician at Harvard Massachusetts General Hospital & # 39; s Emergency Department explains. "People do not understand that yesterday things were going well, and within 24 hours all major games were released when in five days the whole community was closed," he tells Lifehacker. "We have had a difficult time dealing with any slow-down (global warming) and rapid (COVID) changes."
Having conversations about health is often difficult, and recent events have made these conversations very difficult, so to speak Dr. Kate Jansen, assistant professor of psychology at Midwestern University and specializing in health communication. “When you think about effective communication skills and ideas for health care, there are some ways to be successful when talking with an elderly partner about their health,” she says. To help you prepare for these difficult conversations with other older people in your life, here are some tips from mental health professionals on how to do the job (ideally without complaint or spill).
Avoid using the words “elderly” or “vulnerable”
One of the reasons why most of our mature people do not take this issue seriously is the fact that they watch the news and see that affects “elderly” or “vulnerable.” But you will be hard pressed to find someone – no matter your age – to put themselves in those groups. The same applies to "weak" or "weak." So when they hear how COVID-19 affects people entering these categories, there's a good chance they will ignore the information immediately.
Instead, focus on hard data looking at real age (such as numbers, numbers) instead of using words like "elderly" and "vulnerable". Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson are both tested positive. Hanks, 63, somehow manages to mature at once and be respected, while maintaining his youthful temperament. He is wealthy and has access to everything he can, so he points out that he and Wilson are infected with the virus.
Reassure them that you can communicate electronically
If your parent / grandfather / grandfather has an iPhone or iPad, encourage them to deal with you and their friends. The sense of alienation from society can be scary (and anyone, really), so if they can see other people, that can help. If they don't have Apple products, go through the process of downloading Skype and use that.
Another option Linked Life app, with features such as creating a private, private network of family and friends. It has the ability to follow a person's movements. "If you notice that family member activity levels are dropping or participants in social feeds, or in a crowded public space, you can help guide your family member – whether you are a family member. Young or old," Sarah Hoit, CEO of Connected Life
Listen to their concerns
This is important for any communication, but it is especially important when talking to people about COVID-19. She explains: “I think there is something to be said about listening to people and trying to hear their concerns. “Look, I'm a doctor at a large hospital associated with Harvard University, one of the world's leading institutions. My whole life is to talk about statements, jargon and technology because we always want to be technically correct. But that doesn't work well when it comes to changing people's behavior. ”Instead of just talking to people and sorting out all the wrong reasons, ask them about their concerns and tackle one of your strengths. That way you are able to focus on exactly what works for them.
Usually in high-tech communication we focus so much on our messages and problems that we forget to listen to the other person, says Jansen. “As you listen to their thoughts, you repeat their messages to them. For example, if they say & # 39; I'm feeling good, you don't need to worry & # 39; – any message – they point out their key point: & # 39; At present you are feeling well, so this does not seem to be cause for concern. & # 39; This approach lets someone know that you have heard and understood their point of view before, ”explains Jansen. “When we hear that we hear, we are ready to listen.”
Use facts and figures
Because COVID-19 is caused by a new type of coronavirus, it can be difficult for anyone – not just parents and grandparents – to understand what that means. As a doctor in the emergency room, he has been questioning a lot about this type of coronavirus, and says he is trying to stick to things we already know and then paint a picture. This is often said:
“We now have a virus that spreads like a common cold, but is as deadly as a heart attack. Coronavirus mortality rates and heart attacks are similarly high, at 15 percent for anyone over 55 years of age. While we have access to all of the technologies, this is what all previous data and data show us. It is important that they take it seriously. ”
If you use facts and guidelines from places like Centers for Disease Control (CDC) and World Health Organization (WHO) or your local health department, you will need to get used to it first. And if you like the help of finding everything there is and separating the truth from the myth, Lifehacker has an entire section dedicated to the coronavirus cover a number of outbreaks and ways to make your life easier during this difficult time.
Focus on helping others
Sometimes it is difficult to make changes on our own, but when we think about our actions in relation to how they affect other people – especially when dealing with parents, grandparents and elderly loved ones – they can be very effective. Jansen says: “Usually the message that focuses on how to help others is easy to take. "For example, explaining that they are at high risk of infection can cause your loved one to go astray – the idea that you don't need to worry about me & # 39; to your grandchildren / husband. & # 39; ”
Consider the details
When such discussions occur, it can be easy for all parties involved to feel frustrated. Instead of trying to do everything in one conversation, focus on one thing you want your loved one to change. “Pick the best behavior,” says Jacken. “(Saying) & # 39; I'd rather if you'd let me bring some food for the next two weeks, instead of going to the store & # 39; it's much easier to accept than a list of clothes you want to change for life. ”
Follow and express your love
After your interview, follow up and see what they're doing, if changes are made, or if they're in a position where they're ready to hear your concerns, says Jansen. "Ultimately, keeping your relationship strong and showing your love is important."
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